today

SUMMARY OF TODAY:

Grandpa has cancer. the end.

but i wonder how does he know? has he ever felt like this? and i know that you'd be here right now if i could let you know somehow

Today sucked.

Really really just sucked. No other descriptive sound.

Got my schedule for school. Tentative schedule.

1. Physics. Mr. Willey. I'm going to fail.

2. Art. Where I will draw many depictions of geoffery the squirrel.

3. Algebra 2. Where i will also draw many depiction of Geoffery the squirrel.

4. Government and Economics. where i will draw many depictions of jill running away from Geoffery the squirrel.

5. Advanced Newspaper 3. Where i will be awesome and eat cupcakes and then puke them up because i am fat.

6. English dual credit. This is me hoping i will enjoy this class.

7. BCIS. where i will create depictions of Geoffery the squirrel on the computer.

This morning i woke up late, and didnt get to stretch before running mile. which i ran in 9:22 btw.

didnt really do anything at practice.

went to eat with the squad at some place called scot's. that was so disgusting. they brought me water that tasted like it had been boiled in a rusty pot.

Then i went to the school for orientation, but Bobby and i really couldn't be together for very long, because this jackass Mr. Marble gave Bobby a hard time about signing up to work for Pro Grad.

Jack ass.

so i was stuck selling t shirts for the first hour by myself. oh wait, kelly harrington's mom was there too. awkward.

Finally Bobby showed up, and he did a pretty good job of cheering me up. Didnt really say hello to anyone else. Just jill, ryan, beth, and amanda.

i dont really feel like talking to anyone but Bobby.

the more i look back on last year, the more i realize how much could have been avoided if certain people would just keep their mouths shut. but i don't blame you. I just dont want to associate myself with you. or anyone else who might distract me from my goals this year.

(List to follow soon)

I just really dont need to be around people who are going to fuel fires.

at afternoon practice, when i finally got done selling shirts, i had some fun. Bobby really did a great job of cheering me up.

I messed around while the JV team did their cheers which made everyone laugh, but chelsea, tell your cousin to pull down her skirt! good lord! i was about to have to claw my eyes out.

later that practice, fifteen minutes to be exact, we tried this complicated build and skylar landed on my face. so on the way home i wasnt really surprised to find out that my nose was bleeding everywhere.

and now i just noticed that my computer is broken on the side.

A completion to a freakin great day!

till next time xoxo

-a

I listen to our favorite song playin on the radio, hear the dj say loves a game of easy come and easy go

OK, i knew i would be back tonight.

Dad's still yelling at me, no big shocker there.

Apparently if i dont get my radio fixed RIGHT NOW the world is going to end.

That's alright, I'm ignoring everyone right now. I don't feel like talking to anyone but Bobby. Still pretty annoyed by the world right now. And if someone did try to talk to me I would probably snap at them.

I was listening to music on my ipod, and have decide to start writing raps again. I used to love that, i don't know why i stopped...oh yes I do...

ok, so I used to totally hate Miley Cyrus and Hannah Montana and what not, but ever since The Last Song came out, I listen to her all the time.

I even go so far as to watch Hannah Montana, hey dont judge, it's catchy.

still hate demi lovato and selena gomez though. Probably always will.

Anywho...Today in afternoon cheer i had to go to wallmart and buy markers. and get this, they carded me for them. Since when do they card for crayolas?

I did get to see Bobby though, I was really excited about that.

Mrs. Jana was late so we got to spend about fifteen minutes together, and that was just what i needed.

lol, all the freshmen told me how cute we are together, and they're deffinitely right.

So i get home and there's pizza for dinner. Seriously??? EW.

I'm running two miles a day trying to get off all this fat, and they're packing carbs into me like we're storing up for hibernation.

Speaking of running, my nose piercing hurst really bad because i smacked myself in the face during my sprints. Got a little crazy trying to lengthen my stride....

Oh well. I'm sure it'll feel better later until tommorrow when i have to do it all over again.

till i have something better to say xoxoxo

-a

check this video out, i love this song! number two fave!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWCPS6CXmt0

every rose has its thorn, just like every night has its dawn, just like every cow boy sings a sad sad song every rose has its thorn

The only person i feel like talking to right now is Bobby.

That's it.

I'm tired of listening to everyone else, their voices all grating in my ears, it drives me nuts.

Today I'm especially mad because it seems like everything is twilight zoned. For example, today after I was done running, Daemon Lewis said hi to me, and I was like wth?

So I told him that he shouldn't act fake. I get enough of that from Mr. Marble.

He apologized for saying he hates me and says that he would like to be friends. Ok. We hug and make nice, I'm left thinking that this is weird.

Then as I'm walking Bobby to the band's practice field, he tells me that the drumline wants to put Mikayla's face on their shirts.

Of course i say it's fine.

But Bobby told Will that he wouldnt buy a shirt unless he put xs over her face. love you babes.

WTF though? Seriously???

So then in cheer practice this morning, Ms. Jana has me take some things to the office where I find out that Mrs. Mcarthy adores me.

Strange. I always thought she strongly disliked me.

PREVIOUS CONVERSATION:

Mccarthy: I was surprised that you didn't sign up for Powder Puff

Amy: Why?

Mccarthy: I thought you would be good since you're so mean.

Huh. But apparently she loves me.

Later I brought lunch to Bobby, and Pedro was standing outside.

Pedro: I didnt know you got a new car.

Amy: Uh...yeah. I kind of totalled my other one....seven months ago.

Pedro: Oh but I didnt know you got a new one.

Amy: ok....right.

Right.

I can only assume that the day is going to get stranger. so there will probably be another post tonight. Seriously though, what is up with everyone today?

What is up with me recently?

I dont want to be around anyone who ever doubted me and bobby.....i guess i figure theyre just toxic to our relationship....but like i said before, if you don't support us that's fine, just don't expect a lot of love from me.

till tonight xoxoxo

-a

i tried not to hurt yeah i tried but i guess thats why they say

Bobby says that he wishes he was in a coma.

Bobby: I wish I was in a coma so i wouldnt have to hear her.

Amy: :'(I would cry beside your bed every night.

Bobby: ='(

Amy: I do not wish for you to be in a coma.

Bobby:I do....Anything that'll get her away from me...

Amy: And then that would mean you would leave me.

Bobby: No!

Amy:If you were in a coma you would be in a place where even i couldnt save you...

Bobby: I'm sure the most wonderful girl in my life could save me when she knew i needed to be saved.

Amy::( i'm not so sure...

Bobby:Why is that?

Amy: It doesn't work like that baby...

Bobby: So you would leave me?

Amy: No. I would sit beside you. I would read to you, tell you about my day, and lay next to you and listen to your heartbeat. Eighty years might go by....but i will be there, Right beside you. and when you do wake up one day, I'll be right there beside you because i love you.

Bobby: I think that could be a really great story.

Amy: Really?

I hate the way his mother makes him feel like he has no other option in the world.

i really don't understand how she can be so cold to him.

Today hasn't been that good of a day for me. Oh well. Ce'st La Vie. I came home from morning cheer practice to find that my sister had taken my wallflower out of its plug and had turned it sideways so that the oil dripped out of it onto my desk. How special for me. Bonus? it ate away at the finish on the desk and now mom's probably going to yell at me about that. awesome.

It also got all over my sketchbook so now all the sketches that i've been working at all summer long are going to be slowly eaten away by japeneese cherry blossom oil.

Till next time x0x0x0

-a

was it something i said or something i did or something i did? did my words not come out right?

Back again. Today I had to go to work. I hate my job, but I need the money.

My sister got home from camp about ten minutes ago. Here is how our conversation went.

Dad: Amy look who's home.

Amy:....

Mary: Hey Amy.

Amy: Sup.

Dad: Look something's on Amy's nose!

Mary: I know, she told me about it.

Amy:.....

Dad: Amy do you want to watch TV?

Amy: No.

Then came the dramatic exit to my room, close the door and SCENE!

Later on....

Dad: I told you to take out the fucking trash. So quit talking to that lame ass boyfriend of yours and do it.

Amy: ........ok.

It's not that I don't love my sister, I really do. I just really really really don't care too much for my parental units.

You know, being All American Mascot means that in December I could go to the Capitol One bowl and be in the actual pre-game show. I don't even want to go anymore because it would mean that I have to go with my mom and have her on my ass non stop.

Is it to much to ask that they just leave me alone?

Seriously?

I'm not doing anything illegal, I'm giving them money for my car, what I would like is for them to cut me a break and quit trying to act like the freakin brady bunch when people they know are around.

So Mary, I'm glad that you're home. Hopefully they'll yell at you a little more and me a little less.

I'm not going to think about that right now. I'll think about that tomorrow.

Instead I'm going to think of the one thing that gets me through the day and keeps me waking up in the morning.

Every rose has its thorn, I wish that my family would accept mine and quit trying to mold me into something else. I'm not play doh. to hear them tears me up inside, but in a few years, I won't have to hear them anymore...

till next time, xoxo

-a

Was it something i said or something i did or something i did? did my words not come out right?

If there's anyone that loves me for who I am, it's Robert Cardenas the third.

When we first met we hated each other, but Elizabeth Bennet hated Mr. Darcy too, and look where that ended up?

He's what I'm thinking about right now. I spent the whole day with him, and it seems like i love him more and more every day.

He makes me feel like I'm something special, like no one else exists when he's with me. Two years ago, if you had asked me if I ever wanted to get married i would have deffinitely said no. Now, i know that i want to get married, and I know exactly who i want to spend my forever with.

We always say "Forever and Always" and i really believe that.

Today I really put his love to the test, could he love me even though on football nights I'll dress up like a goofy looking buff guy. I was so nervous, I felt so ugly standing next to all the cheerleaders, wishing that I was still one and not knowing what i had gotten myself into.

But Bobby was so sweet to me.

He helped me carry my things inside the American Legion Hall and helped me get dressed, he didn't laugh when I danced around like a dummy during the Horse.

Afterwards, all i wanted to do was run into his arms and sleep forever.

We went out for ice cream instead. Second best thing. We ate our ice cream and talked about forever. I really felt happier than I have in a while. Usually i have a million different things on my mind, but with Bobby, nothing else is important.

Spending time with Bobby lifts my spirits up, he knows exactly what to say to make me feel alright, and we both understand each other's crazy neurotic families. When we talk about our future, I have something to look forward to, and this year I'm letting go of all this anger that I have built up inside me. This year is just about becoming a better person for the man i love. Bobby loves me thorns and all, and I love him especially for his thorns. It's nice to be wanted by someone so beautiful.

till next time xoxo

-a

We both lie silent and still in the dead of the night, although we both lie close together we feel miles apart inside...

Ok, so most people start their blogs off by saying "Hey my name is blah blah blah i like pina coladas and long walks on the beach!". Sorry, that's not what this blog is about.

I chose the title 'EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN' because that's kind of how I'm feeling right now.

If you want the good, amazing, surprisingly wonderful things about me, then you're going to have to accept the crazy, sadistic, evil about me too.

And if you can't, then maybe you should stop and consider why you want me in your life. Because I wouldn't ask you to change for me, so don't ask me to change for you.

there are a few things that you should know about me.

I have a wonderful boyfriend named Bobby who i hope to marry one day(more gushing details about him later), too many pets to ever blog about, I'm a senior in High School, and I never talk shit that I can't back up.

And here i said i was not going to do the pina colada thing...sigh.

till next time, xoxo

-a